Failed Stewardship idea #17: "Ananias & Sapphira Sunday"

Acts 5:  But a man named Ananias, with the consent of his wife Sapphira, sold a piece of property;  with his wife’s knowledge, he kept back some of the proceeds, and brought only a part and laid it at the apostles’ feet.  ‘Ananias,’ Peter asked, ‘why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and to keep back part of the proceeds of the land?  While it remained unsold, did it not remain your own? And after it was sold, were not the proceeds at your disposal? How is it that you have contrived this deed in your heart? You did not lie to us but to God!’  Now when Ananias heard these words, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard of it.  The young men came and wrapped up his body, then carried him out and buried him.

After an interval of about three hours his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter said to her, ‘Tell me whether you and your husband sold the land for such and such a price.’ And she said, ‘Yes, that was the price.’  Then Peter said to her, ‘How is it that you have agreed together to put the Spirit of the Lord to the test? Look, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.’ Immediately she fell down at his feet and died. When the young men came in they found her dead, so they carried her out and buried her beside her husband. And great fear seized the whole church and all who heard of these things.

Ideally, the service should be held in the graveyard adjacent to the church building, during a cold, misty drizzle.  The Presider processes out of the church; servers follow behind with garden spades.  The congregation shuffles, hands in pockets. 

Presider:  The Lord gave  10 plagues.

All:  The Lord gave 10 commandments.

Presider:  The Lord gave 10 lepers health.

All:  The Lord is a perfect 10.

Presider:  What shall we give the Lord in return for His kindness?

All:  We shall give our 10 percent.

All hold out wallets/chequebooks etc., as Acts 5 is read.  During the reading the servers shall clang the garden spades together after the phrases "and he fell down dead" and "she fell down at his feet and died".

After the reading the Presider says "The Word of the Lord", to which all respond "Thank God it wasn't us", to which the Presider responds "But it might be next time".

A collection is then taken.

(Here ends the shortened form of the service.  A children's story might include having the Sunday School dig small holes in the ground, one for each child.  Divide the group by gender into "Jr. Ananiases" and "Jr. Sapphiras".  Use popsicle sticks for "grave markers".)

Comments

[Malcolm+]

Coincidentally, it happens to be Stewardship Sunday this coming Sunday.

[Malcolm+]

BTW, unfortunate that Common Praise has bowdlerized "Take my life and let it be," losing the Stewardship Sunday verse:

"Take my silver and my gold.
Not a mite would I withhold."

[Gene]

Lovely.

Loony Liturgy on the edge!!

You could add another line for the Presider: Open your wallets and repeat after me. "Help yourself." (Thanks to The Goons).

[joseph]

We are having a stewardship sunday on Nov 30.

Feel free to distribute and use the above liturgy, with the provision that 10% of the day's take goes to "St Timothy's Rector's Discretionary Fund" :^)

[Donald McKenzie]

After reading that liturgy, I'm not sure we should be giving the rector at St. Timothy's any further opportunities to act in a discretionary manner.